Tag Archives: advice

Do you know when to kick people out of your circle?

Sometimes people only show you the side of them they want you to see.  They pretend to love and adore you.  They offer you advice that they wouldn’t dare take themselves.  They deep down inside would rather see you destitute  and alone than rich with health, wealth, and friendship.

Be aware.  Sniff these hypocrits out so that you can decrease your circle’s radius of these wolves wearing sheep’s clothing and increase  your circle’s diameter with  people that will radiate you and not deflate you.


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Posted by on January 5, 2016 in I Am She


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Are you that Crab in a Pot?

Are you that Crab in a Pot?

Have you ever noticed how crabs that are caught in a net, dangling from the end of the bait, about to be cooked in a pot, hold on to each other for dear life? I know you have noticed. You can’t help but notice. Well, they grab each other by the legs and by the claws and they pull and pull until they damn near break each other’s legs off. In some cases, they do break off the legs and claws. In extreme cases, they kill each other. I know you are wondering where this is going, right? Well, if you know me, you know I am fitting to tell you!

Are you a crab? I am not talking about literally a crab, but figuratively speaking. Are you that person that sees your friend, associate, or maybe a rival, getting ahead and you hate on them, sabotage them, or make their accomplishment seem like it is mediocre? In other words, you young folk, may refer to this “crab behavior” as being a “hater”.

Well, I say, don’t hate the player, hate the game. What God Has For You is For You! No man, woman, crab, or hater can take that away. Anyway, back to my crabs, they pull and hold on, but failing to realize that the more they hold on to what the other crab has, the more they put themselves closer to the boiling pot. Humph, I think all of us have been a crab at some point in our lives; however, the crabs that miss the boiling pot are the ones who realize that they must just LET IT GO or Kick the ‘ish out of those CRABS holding on!  I’m just saying!

Crabs in a Pot Video

~Ni’KayCrabs in a Pot

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Posted by on January 5, 2016 in Uncategorized


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Dreams of Graduation!

You have dreams of graduation and it is finally here. Congratulations are definitely in order. However, in 2012, what happens when you graduate and your dreams become shattered because the job market is at an all time low for your profession. Seriously, you have worked for 4 to 8 years only to find yourself working in retail, fast foods, or some other market that is irrelevant to your field. This is a travesty. Who do you blame? What do you do with all that education? How do you pay back all of those loans? Is it an epidemic? Is it a crisis? Is it our reality? When will it all end?

I urge you to research the job market before you go back to school and work on those Bachelors, Masters, and Doctorate degrees. Although you may not want to admit it, it is about the money! So, show me the money!!! You do not want to dedicate yourself to a field that is not going to allow you to gain any financial merit! Yes, you need to enjoy what you do! However, at the end of the day, if you are not making enough money to live a comfortable lifestyle, then the enjoyment will soon fade away.

So, with that being said, here are my suggestions for those of you ready to pursue your education in a graduate program:

1. Research the job market for your field of study (Will you have to relocate to find a job in your field? What is
the salary range?).
2. Look for in-state universities to work on your degree (it will save $$$$$).
3. Begin to network early (make those job connections prior to graduation).
4. Build your resume/curriculum vita (professional organizations, social organizations, honor societies, community
service etc.)
5. Know your worth!

I hope that this information was helpful to someone.


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I know sometimes I am not inspired to write…especially when it comes to my poetry.  Usually, I can look, hear, smell or even taste something that will inspire me to write about it…lately, nothing!

What do you do to get yourself inspired to write again?


Posted by on April 18, 2012 in Uncategorized


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Born to Die


Why do we cry when people are laid to rest?  We are all born to die. It’s like a blueprint for life.  Once the clock strikes that magic hour, our time is up. 

Why do we cry when people are laid to rest?  Isn’t the place we are going better than here on Earth?

Why do we cry when people are laid to rest?  Is it because we didn’t give them the flowers while they were here or is it because we mistreated them?

Why do we cry when people are laid to rest?  When the ashes turn to ashes and dust turns to dust, we know that is where we came from and where we will return. It is our destiny.

Why do we cry when people are laid to rest?  Is there a certain level of jealousy because you know their troubles are now over and you have to go back to your miserable reality?

Why do we cry when people are laid to rest?  Well, I hypothesize that we are trained to be sad when someone dies, but there are several things that we need to realize. 

We need to know that weeping may endure for a night, but joy will come in the morning.  Now, it might not be tomorrow morning. It may not be the next morning or even the next, but it will come. 

Lastly, understand that there is no need to cry because we all were born to die.

© Author NiKay

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Posted by on April 7, 2012 in Uncategorized


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Love Hurts

Love hurts sometimes, even when you love or are in love.  Some say that there is a difference, but I don’t see one at all.  Love is love regardless of who or where it comes from.  You can give love.  You can get love. You can take love.  But in order to secure love, you must make sacrifices.  These sacrifices may not feel nice.  These sacrifices may hurt so bad that they don’t seem like love at all.  You may even begin to think that love is hate.  However, love is not hate, but love is sacrifice. 

At times you may have to sacrifice your time, your money, your space, your life, your friends, your family, or your heart!  Oh, your heart. How fragile it is!  Your heart is an organ…an organ…that is it.  But love is a feeling that people “associate” with the heart.  However, it is a feeling inside, but inside your soul.  It shines so bright that nothing can hide it. You love so HARD that know one can deny it. It doesn’t matter if you are young or old…love will hurt!

However, don’t expect love to do all the work.  Love alone won’t always keep things tight.  Love expects for the individuals to do their part and do it right.  Love has friends that you may need to get to know.  Patience, honesty, trust, responsibility, compassion, attentiveness, and many, many more.  You need to get to know them if you want love to grow.  Yes, LOVE may hurt, but pain goes away in time.  However, if your love continues to hurt, then love may be nothing more than something only in YOUR mind.

Yes, love hurts because love is not perfect.  Love is definitely not vain.  Love is not choosy.  Love is not always sane.  Some people are CRAZY in Love. Love can come in all forms and sizes.  Love can give you all kinds of surprises.

However, if love hurts to touch, then love isn’t love at all.  Love is a facade for a relationship gone wrong.

©Author Ni’Kay

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Posted by on March 27, 2012 in Uncategorized


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Hate on Player

Most people wonder how it is that some people tend to have more than others. Some may wonder why people have more than they have. In other words, why didn’t I get that job?  Why is she married, but I’m not. Haters….Hate on Player is what I say.  One of the seven deadly sins is envy.  When your are envious of another person for what they have,then you are blocking your own blessings because you are too busy worrying about someone else who has received a blessing.  So, just remember what God has for you is for you.


~Author Nikay

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Posted by on March 15, 2012 in Uncategorized


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